6/26/20

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David Sulzer, AKA Dave Soldier (1956- )

The piece which I wanted to talk about today is another like Tom Johnson’s Failing, which I found out about only because of how popular it had become online. The Most Unwanted Song is a piece written by David Sulzer, who uses the stage name “Dave Soldier” for all of his musical endeavors (meaning I will be referring to him as Dave Soldier in post, unless I am speaking biographically). It is important to clarify this distinction as David Sulzer is an incredibly accomplished neuroscientist who has done extensive research into Parkinson’s Disease and neurotransmission, whereas Dave Solder is the creator of the abomination which you will be listening to shortly. That’s right - I may have to go back and check, but I am pretty sure that this is the first post in which I use the term “abomination” to describe the piece I selected.

The Most Unwanted Song is the product of a collaboration between Dave Soldier and artists Vitaly Komar and Alexander Melamid: between the years of 1994 and 1997, Komar and Melamid created a series of paintings known as The People’s Choice. After conducting polls in 11 different countries, the two went on to create “the most wanted painting” and “the least wanted painting” for each country. Following that, Soldier teamed up with Komar and Melamid to create a survey with a similar approach (but now focused on music) which can be found here. The People’s Choice : Music brought in responses from several hundred Americans, and with the data in hand, the collaboration finished The Most Wanted Song and The Most Unwanted Song in 1997. As you might expect, The Most Wanted Song is incredibly approachable - there is nothing too special about it, but also very little to take issue with. While it will never be the greatest song produced, it achieves its goal by simply reflecting popular musical tastes at the end of the 20th century and coming across as universally ‘good.’

Enter: The Most Unwanted Song. Just as the name implies, this piece is the demonic little step-brother that came out of the artistic collaboration between Soldier, Komar, and Melamid. The piece is scored for operatic soprano (singing and rapping), children’s choir, accordion, bagpipes, banjo, flute/piccolo, harmonica, organ, synthesizers, tuba, and harp, and lasts between 20-25 minutes. Already you may be questioning whether or not it is worth your time to give the piece a listen, but I assure you that not matter how revolting it may be, it is worth experiencing at least once in your life. There is a subtle brilliance to the piece, because while it may be easy to hate, there is nothing truly damaging or obscene about the piece - there is no high pitch frequencies or loud horns which could easily turn listeners away, only carefully thought out annoyances. Between overt repetition, unpredictable tempo changes, sections of atonal improvisation, and discombobulated mix of genres, there is an impressively long list of things not to like about The Most Unwanted Song. I also firmly believe that Dave Soldier deserves serious credit for the realization of this work - even though he was able to work directly with the responses from hundreds of Americans, creating something that is so off-putting is no small feat. The piece is a unique combination of disjointed elements with enough underlying complexity to make it so distasteful to the average listener.

In many of my posts I tend to comment on how the piece I am writing about either struck me immediately or grew on me slowly. For obvious reasons, this is not one of those posts. You may find it hard to admit that this piece has any musical merit at all, but even so, I would encourage you to find some appreciation for the comedic quality alone. Again, this piece is not “The Most Painful Song,” but rather The Most Unwanted Song. Throw yourself into it, even as unbearable as it may be: the Oh-God-not-this-again quality of the piece (and yes, that is correct musical terminology) fades around 15 minutes in. Below I have linked the original recording of the piece, and if you are interested in looking at the score, that can be found here (and as someone who works with music notation and engraving software often, I must add that I find it hilarious how the messy engraving matches the mood of the piece as a whole). Listen to it at your own pace - if you need to take a cold shower or spend some time evacuating your stomach between verses, do so and come back to it a bit later. I promise you will come out the other end a more enlightened person, aside from maybe never being able to look at a Walmart the same ever again.